For the Woman Who Is Always the One Who Notices
Dear One,
I want to write to you today about something small that is not small at all.
You are probably the one who notices. The one who feels the temperature of the room change before anyone says a word. The one who remembers that he had the hard meeting today, who knows which child is off, who senses the quiet before it becomes a problem and quietly moves to fix it.
It is a kind of love, that noticing. A deep one. And it is also, so often, a lonely one. Because the person who notices everything is usually the person no one thinks to notice back.
I am not going to tell you today how to fix that. Some weeks are not for fixing. Some weeks are just for being seen for a moment, by someone who understands the particular tiredness of always being the one who is paying attention.
So let me say it plainly. I see how much rests on you. I see how much of it no one thanks you for. And I want you to know that the fact that you are tired does not mean you are failing. It means you have been loving people in a way that asks a great deal of you, for a long time, often without much coming back.
You are allowed to want some of it to come back.
That is all for today. No quiz, no task, nothing to do. Just this: you were noticed here this week. Rest if you can.
I’m right here with you.
Dr. Dar